With Joy and Tears

With Joy and Tears

Let me begin by apologizing for the lack of daily consistency in updating this blog. Even as I begin to write this we are in a small agricultural village near the Polish and Lithuanian borders. I am writing early in the morning and hope to post this later tonight when we arrive back in the capital city where there will be a good internet connection (again, I say hopefully). The last week has been far busier than I could have imagined. And yet with that business has been great fruit in our own souls. Fruit born through the testimony to the Word of God as it is lived out in the lives of the followers of Jesus Christ here. Let me briefly explain some of what has transpired.

On Friday I concluded my teaching in the seminary with a dear group of precious believers who left that very afternoon to go back to their towns and villages to shepherd their flocks. I wonder if we really understand what faithfulness even is. One of the students Vladimir (who those of you in our church will remember well), left the class, got on a train, rode five hours into the Chernobyl zone to his church. His level of financial support is negligible in proportion to his need. He and his wife have 7 children, with the eighth child due in September. He lives in a house that would probably be considered unlivable and unsafe in the United States. He delivers groceries to more remote villages without a market for extra money. For ten years he has faithfully labored to share the Gospel in an area many have abandoned due the dangers of the radiation fallout from the Chernobyl accident many years ago. And yet, a more joyful man you will not and cannot find. He is unquestionably a great leader of men. The sense of respect in the class for him was obvious. The hunger for God's Word and to be a more faithful Shepherd radiate from him. All the while, doing it with a charm, heir of grace, and refreshing humor. You are probably experiencing two emotions right now. First, you are filled with admiration for a brother in Christ who courageously lives such a sacrificial life for the cause of Christ's Kingdom. This is a correct response. Second, you are probably feeling a sense of sorrow for him because of the conditions that he endures. I join you in such thoughts. How I wish I could change the external conditions of these men to reflect the blessings God has bestowed on all of us, and yet change my own internal heart attitudes to reflect the character that God has blessed them with. But the thing with Vladimir that is truly a rebuke of gigantic proportion is this. After ten years of such faithful labor, in some of the most difficult conditions, his church has only seventeen members. Now honestly, what would we have done? Don't flatter yourself with thoughts of grandeur. You, like me, would have quit long ago from discouragement, disillusion, and maybe even bitterness. But what of the seventeen souls? Do they not need a shepherd? Are they less important because others have refused the message of the Gospel? You see, this is faithfulness.

Another of my experiences this week came from another brother in the class named Sasha (short for Alexander). When the week began I mistakenly made a mental note about Sasha that he was disinterested, somewhat calloused, and even contrary. He challenged me more than anyone else throughout the week. At first, giving no indication that my answers either satisfied or further frustrated him. But as the week progressed on I found that he was not disinterested, but serious in a way that few if any others were. He was deeply contemplative. At some points conflicted over grief for people in his own church that were struggling and with a proper response on his part to them. Toward the end of the week, he would approach me at the end of a session and apologize explaining he wasn't trying to be difficult. I already knew that and had come to admire and appreciate him. The week ended with an invitation to visit him on my next trip. An invitation I will gladly accept! I came to appreciate genuine, gentle toughness about this man. But it wasn't until the end of the week that this took on its full context. We were driving with our host (the dean of the school in which I was teaching in the seminary) one afternoon and he calmly says, "do you know what Sasha used to do before he became a Christian?". I did not know but what I would shortly found out made Sasha an even more remarkable man in my eyes. My host said, "he used to be an enforcer for the Russian Mafia". That needed no explanation, I knew what they did and still do. After the collapse of the former Soviet Union many of the KGB and other government thugs turned to organized crime and brought other into their "business opportunities". He explained that Sasha was in charge of torturing people until they paid or complied with the area bosses. But through the testimony of a faithful Christian who loved Sasha in spite of his "job", he finally came to accept the forgiveness of Jesus Christ and renounced what was no doubt a lucrative lifestyle. Two thoughts about this struck me. First, is the way in which he came to Christ. Over time as this faithful missionary shared the Gospel the Holy Spirit began working in Sasha's heart drawing him to Christ. The final straw according to Sasha was a point in which the missionary, knowing Sasha was a thief, decided to show him extraordinary love by allowing Sasha to watch his personal money one night. The man claimed he had no where else to keep it, and that he would like for Sasha to take care of it for him. Sasha said at that point the love and trust of this man convinced him that he too should become a follower of Jesus Christ! He surrendered completely to Jesus that day and never looked back! This brings me to the second remarkable thing. When you are that deeply involved in the Russian Mafia, you don't just walk away. But Sasha did. In spite of the potential dangers to his own life, he gladly followed Jesus and renounced his former lifestyle. I ask myself two questions: 1) Am I loving anyone like that missionary did in loving Sasha? 2) Do I have the courage to walk off from anything, or everything, to follow the lead of Jesus my Savior?

These brothers I have just mentioned are not the exception here, they are the rule! I feel unworthy to even be in the same room, but I know I need to be in the room with them because these are the men I want to imitate. Sure, I may have had more formal education, I may have more access to Christian literature and material. But I need the character they have that runs to the very core of their being. Character that causes a young man like Vitaly in his early twenties to go to a rural farming village where the young people are leaving the others and the aging to fend for themselves. There are nine believers there who need a preacher and pastor so Vitaly answers the call. Character that causes a young woman like Violette, my translator in the class, a skilled linguistic expert par excellent, and classically trained musician to endure harassment from the KGB and continue serving the Lord. Her father an atheist, her mother suffering from a mental illness, no one to really encourage her, yet she plods on in incredible servant minded determination. Time forbids me here, but I promise you will hear more about these dear brothers and sisters in the days ahead as I return home and reflect on all that God did in my heart.

So as I conclude this update I am sitting comfortably at 36,000 feet somewhere over the North Atlantic Ocean thrilled to return to my wife, my sons, my family, and my church. But something deep inside of me stayed in Belarus. A longing to return someday to learn more, and to encourage these brothers however I can. From what I have heard the week was profitable for the students. I was given several things by them to take home to remember them by. Gestures that mean more to me than I could say. I was hoisted into the air with approval at the conclusion. A sign that I took as a bond of brotherhood with them. But what I came to do for them seems to have faded into darkness behind me as I travel west with the sun. Unwittingly, they taught me, when I had come to be the teacher. I gave them grids for thinking theologically and Biblically about things like preaching, counseling, and decision making areas important in church planting. They gave me a love for the Lord and passion for ministry I didn't know existed.

So after reading this, who wants to join me on the next trip over? I thought so!